So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
