YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
