I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
