I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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