ADVERTISEMENT

• (802): View more from Vermont

  good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...

  Fav 14 1022 2825

  share tweet
  

• (416): View more from Ontario

  I wanna be on tlc

  (905): View more from Toronto

  Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.

  Fav 17 4537 852

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (813): View more from Florida

  He had one of those small greek statue penises

  Fav 33 1090 5678

  share tweet
  

• (416): View more from Ontario

  dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening

  Fav 12 7479 925

  share tweet
  
• 

  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (734): View more from Michigan

  I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.

  Fav 12 5248 1067

  share tweet
  

• (313): View more from Michigan

  She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.

  Fav 20 8398 1454

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (540): View more from Virginia

  Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.

  Fav 6 896 1505

  share tweet
  

• (630): View more from Illinois

  When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"

  Fav 5 800 1461

  share tweet
  

• (609): View more from New Jersey

  i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.

  Fav 2 1252 1430

  share tweet
  
• 

  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.

  Fav 2 834 582

  share tweet
  

• (708): View more from Illinois

  honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month

  Fav 1 477 479

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (773): View more from Illinois

  Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.

  Fav 1 377 584

  share tweet
  

• (847): View more from Illinois

  My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.

  Fav 1 292 463

  share tweet
  

• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.

  Fav 0 534 140

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (225): View more from Louisiana

  I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean

  Fav 1 42 78

  share tweet
  

Randomize