At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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