we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
The power of my boobs compel you
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
