i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
