is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
