Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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