She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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