My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
