So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
