THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize