Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
