the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Randomize
