I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
We had to coat check the pizza.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
