Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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