that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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