I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
