why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
