I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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