No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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