the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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