I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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