Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
