Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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