party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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