Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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