That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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