Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize