i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
