how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
