On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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