And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
