No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
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