I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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