everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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