Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize