Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
