She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
