Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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