Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
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