There is no way he is gay with that hair.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
