I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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