break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize
