I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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