rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
