My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
my sisters under your porch take her home
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
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He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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