Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize
