Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize